Stephen questions if Barack Obama is an elitist, takes a look at the top ten beaches of the Arctic, and discusses endangered cats with Alan Rabinowitz. (0:32)
Stephen was sick all weekend and cold medicine wasn't doing the trick, so he reverse-engineered some crank and made some Sudafed which he snorted. (1:42)
Viewers alert Stephen to the fact that Killer is on a commando mission to rescue Stephen Jr. and couldn't possibly have been on the previous night's show. (2:08)
Today's prom is a minefield for our youth -- the sex, the gangsta rapping music, the drinking, the smoking of the grass and the smoking of the ecstasy pills. (3:30)
Stephen encourages countries like Congo and Sierra Leone to give America money first, so that we can one day help them solve their own problems. (4:19)