Prime Minister Tony Blair may be converting to Catholicism, according to a priest who heard it from a bishop who heard it from a cardinal who read it in the British tabloids. (1:55)
The Bush administration is thinking of closing the prison at Guantanamo Bay and moving it elsewhere. Stephen figures they'll move it to Mars, and he knows exactly why. (4:17)
The Mexican government is upset that the U.S. government built a fence on its side of the border. Stephen assures them it was a Christmas present. (1:12)
Fred Thompson's ex-girlfriends are lining up to endorse him, so Stephen is rewarding the potential presidential candidate's ability to do it Alpha-Doggie style. (1:55)
David France tells Stephen about the science that further supports the theory that homosexuality is genetic, but must admit that not all the science has been scienced. (6:30)
Steve Pelkey's store in New Hampshire allows Massachusetts residents access to fireworks for the Fourth of July, making him the Harriet Tubman of fireworks. (4:11)
Stephen stocks up the eggnog in December so he can nog out all year long. His doctor says he's got a mass of powdered nutmeg obstructing his lower intestine. Again. (1:29)