George Clooney speaking out about Darfur is the worst thing to happen since Paul Newman spoke out against the atrocities of the Hidden Valley ranch. (0:35)
Stephen honors the heroes who toil to plump our sunken cheeks, hoist our drooping buttocks and thread serrated plastic sutures through the fatty layers beneath our necks. (1:31)
Stephen Colbert answers viewers' questions about the troops in Iraq, the Better Know a District map and the best way to clean the American flag. (3:24)
Stephen's set to announce the winner of the Green Screen Challenge -- but not without paying tribute, in montage form, to the many heroes who submitted entries. (2:37)
Stephen reminds his viewers that just because the numbers on the board are between one and five hundred, that doesn't mean the number he's thinking of is. (3:28)
Stephen recalls the uneventful events from his week off that only included performing medical experiments on himself and traveling the world behind a mask. (1:58)