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Episode: #01009
Samuel Alito believes that a woman should have to tell her husband she's having an abortion, even if he's bearing arms -- which, constitutionally, could include machine guns. (3:51)
Episode: #01016
Stephen uses The DaColbert Code to pierce the veil of secrecy and solve modern-day mysteries. (3:31)
Episode: #02001
Reverend Herbert H. Lusk hosts a huge rally for Supreme Court Justice nominee Samuel J. Alito because, apparently, he really believes in him. (1:11)
Episode: #02003
What Samuel Alito said in the past shouldn't have anything to do with the present or future. (3:24)
Episode: #02003
Stephen looks at Samuel Alito's confirmation hearings, sits down with "20/20"'s John Stossel, and compares Freddy Krueger and the Mars rover. (0:31)
Episode: #02003
Stephen proves that, contrary to media criticism, Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito is an exciting and hilarious man. (2:30)
Episode: #02003
Stephen adds a piggy bank to his bookshelf and puts in a dollar for the children's future. He tells them to smash it open in 2050 and trade the dollars for the new currency. (1:41)
Episode: #02004
With the Miss America Competition reincorporating the word "Pageant" into its title, Stephen urges the rest of the world to have a little more zazz. (3:29)
Episode: #02005
Stephen has an elaborate idea for keeping America's borders closed, hinged on the cheap labor of illegal immigrants. (2:21)
Episode: #02008
We could put an end to stone-throwing if we all lived in glass houses. (3:07)
Episode: #02013
After three months on a pedestal Stephen has lost touch with real Americans, so he's going unscripted. (4:34)
Episode: #02014
Stephen boils down the top stories of the day, including news for female presidents both fake and real. (3:15)
Episode: #02016
Punxsutawney Phil predicts six more weeks of winter, which makes him smarter than all those global warming scientists. (1:06)
Episode: #02130
New Jersey's 4th District Congressman Christopher Smith wouldn't sit down with Stephen, but his challenger, Carol Gay, would. Stephen offers her a few free campaign slogans. (5:59)
Episode: #05095
Sonia Sotomayor's personal background should be neutralized the way Band-Aids were when they reached out to minorities. (05:16)
Episode: #05129
What kind of cable package does Samuel Alito have that he can watch the Human Sacrifice Channel, and why can't Stephen get it? (03:37)
