America needs to get back in the game of overpopulation by instituting a one-child minimum policy and letting teens spread sex misinformation to their peers. (04:51)
Barack Obama awards the Medal of Freedom to Sidney Poitier, the NRA recognizes Sarah Palin for gun collecting, and Joe Jonas steals Stephen's idea at the "Teen Choice Awards." (05:19)
If Republicans want to stop Sonia Sotomayor's nomination, they must accuse her of bigotry, uncover her secrets and make her weigh in on abortion. (06:19)
Stephen suggests that the Republican senators who lost their seats be impregnated with a womb transplant to save the embryos they wanted to destroy. (4:01)