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Stephen worries about the fate of his over-the-counter man-seed and responds to non-factual statements by Senator Jon Kyl. (04:41)
Barack Obama is so desperate for a bump in the polls that he takes the easy road of killing the world's most wanted man. (04:44)
The Emergency Beckpack is filled with everything needed to survive in a post-Glenn world, including beef stroganoff. (03:57)
Stephen celebrates his Constitutional right to carry his pistol Sweetness, the state of man-gun relations and legislation that would allow babies to pack heat. (03:24)
Fox News sets a bad precedent by suspending two contributors who might be running for president. (02:28)
Stephen believes the same shadowy forces behind the uprising in Egypt are also responsible for the disappearance of King Tut's penis. (05:34)
Dan Burton proposes a bulletproof Congressional plexiglass dome, and Peter King wants to keep guns 1,000 feet from federal officials. (03:51)
If incendiary rhetoric isn't connected to the Arizona tragedy, it logically follows that it must be good. (06:42)
Jay the Intern demonstrates how well the gold standard works when he delivers Stephen's coffee and his change. (05:42)
Steven Slater quits his job and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad unveils a brand-new diorama of a missile. (03:26)
Stephen breaks out the Atone Phone for the Jewish High Holidays and testifies before Congress. (04:19)
Stephen trains for space travel and hoops it up with Allan Houston and the New York Knicks. (04:49)
The Colbert Report goes hi-def, and Morgan Freeman reads a list of untrustworthy things. (05:01)
Stephen tries to decipher Glenn Beck's language and reviews "Sex and the City 2." (03:36)
Greece descends into economic chaos, and Ricky Martin finally comes out of the closet. (04:29)
With Glenn Beck's Food Insurance and Stephen's Food Insurance Insurance, America as we know it may end, but at least Americans as we know them will still be fat. (04:09)
Stephen tracks the rise of the Tea Party movement from Hannity and Beck to Palin and O'Donnell. (03:57)
If Mark Shriver says, "help the poor or they will rise up against us," Stephen will invite him to the March to Keep Fear Alive. (10:09)
Stephen consults his prophetic goose, Geese Witherspoon, to find out if he should hold his own rally. (07:33)
Glenn Beck re-founds America, anti-Muslim sentiment continues to grow, and Richard Engel returns from Iraq. (00:32)