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Stephen needs billionaire donations because he blew a lot of Colbert Nation's Super PAC cash hiring Oscar winner Kevin Kline. (05:30)
Since Oprah won't send Stephen's audience to D.C., he buys them tickets for the Shin Wu Chinatown bus. (03:56)
Stephen just wants to tell Oprah that he was kidding and she's wonderful. (00:15)
Eugene Robinson sees four categories of black America, and Stephen should feel threatened by all of them. (07:11)
Rick Sanchez's endorsement of the March to Keep Fear Alive will get Stephen tens of supporters. (04:17)
Stephen converts 1.5 billion Muslims to Christianity in under 30 minutes and can't wait to hear what Sean Wilentz has to mumble. (00:31)
The conservative group, Americans for Prosperity, cheers when they hear the news of Chicago's failure to host the 2016 Olympics. (01:25)
Cheerios marketing receives FDA scrutiny, soda drinkers face paralysis, and Oprah endorses dubious health advice. (07:17)
The election is a setback for the McCain campaign, but he will come back fighting and take this thing. (02:58)
Pat's cheesesteaks are more experienced and Clintonian, while Geno's cheesesteaks are like Obama's fresh face. (2:11)
Salman Rushdie comes out of hiding to tell Stephen about the importance of literary criticism. (5:06)
Tonight, Stephen reports on Hillary Clinton's repeal, details Oprah's presidential candidate pick and interviews author Nassim Nicholas Taleb. (0:31)
Current threats include Oprah, publicists, Austrian animal rights activists, spiders and Knut, the abandoned polar bear. (6:31)
Russell Simmons talks about Oprah, diamonds and the secret to success. (5:46)
You don't build an empire with feelings -- unless you're Oprah. (2:42)
Stephen encourages countries like Congo and Sierra Leone to give America money first, so that we can one day help them solve their own problems. (4:19)
Stephen defends Lisa Nowak, not so much for confronting her romantic rival, but for wearing a diaper -- plenty of busy professionals, like Bill Gates, wear diapers. (2:37)
Rugged good ol' boy Matthew McConaughey is out. Leftist pretty boy George Clooney is in. (4:58)
Stephen gets choked up after realizing that he's affected Oprah's vocabulary. (2:05)
Stephen is inspired because he spent the whole day listening to Oprah and Friends on XM Radio. (1:34)