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Stephen pays tribute to the great Americans who bring us the news whether we want it or not. (04:39)
Obama indoctrinates America's school children, Tucker Carlson reveals Muslims' influence on textbooks, and Tony Danza teaches high school. (06:18)
Educators ban man-words from textbooks, and Stephen discovers America's newest pop sensation, Movits! (03:55)
Hillary Clinton was the Democratic frontrunner until Barack Obama thought it looked like fun and decided to give it a try, too. (2:46)
Governor Eliot Spitzer's appearance on the show was sandwiched between his illegal activities. (4:19)
Now that America has won back the hot dog eating crown, Stephen discusses Hunger Awareness Day and the rising prices of food. (6:38)
Anderson Cooper, come down off your high war horse and report the stories we want to know about! (4:09)
Stephen loves the idea of raising fines for broadcast indecency so much that he wants to be the first one to pay. (3:49)
The steel magnolia ya-ya sisterhood of the traveling pants breaks up when Katie Couric leaves the "Today Show." (5:15)
Throughout the bible, polygamy has been just as traditional as monogamy but a lot hotter. (3:40)
If you wanna showcase how private you are, come out and do it in public. (4:57)
The movie "Brokeback Mountain" did not strike Stephen's chord; his chord was untouched. (3:28)
Stephen Colbert struts his stuff before Washington Post fashion columnist Robin Givhan. (6:30)
The threat of lethal injection is the number one reason Stephen hasn't murdered anyone yet. (4:51)
Stephen supports Congress' Cheeseburger Bill, which makes it unlawful to sue any corporation for making fatty foods. (2:28)