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Barack Obama throws himself a lavish birthday party instead of working on the economy, so the recession will last four hours longer. (03:34)
Daniel Ellsberg, the man who leaked the Pentagon Papers, says Julian Assange is definitely not a criminal. (08:27)
John Legend encourages people to stay involved and aware of what's going on in the world with his tribute to protest songs from the 60s and 70s. (03:24)
If Muslims really need to get together, they can meet at a camp or a compound out in the wilderness. (04:16)
Afghanistan is like a slot machine that America has been warming up for nine years, and it's about to pay off. (05:24)
Democratic campaign strategist Bob Shrum wants to know if Stephen's wrist injury has made him reconsider his position on universal health care. (6:33)
Senator Mike Gravel believes Spartans encouraged homosexuality because they fight harder for the people they love. (7:02)
Stephen asks Sean Penn if he snuck weapons of mass destruction out of Iraq in a bulky raincoat to embarrass the president. (5:00)
Stephen feels the draft should be reinstated so that America can go back to the days of Vietnam when they hated protesters more than the war. (3:10)
Historian Doris Kearns Goodwin tells Stephen that if Abraham Lincoln were alive today, he might be the host of The Colbert Report. (6:15)
The best way to come up with the best exit strategy is to get the super group of the Nixon administration back together. (2:58)