Episode #08103

Discriminating gays victimize America's horny, shrieking bachelorettes, while Mitt Romney's innovative iPhone app doubles his presidential odds. (07:37)

Tags:  Tip/Wag,  bachelor/bachelorette parties,  marriage,  Mitt Romney,  iPhone,  elections,  cracks up,  lookin' good,  fashion,  gay/homosexual,  same-sex marriage,  discrimination,  men/women,  strippers,  poverty,  Hollywood,  primaries,  Texas,  Apple,  photos,  Ron Paul,  Jimmy,  performances,  songs,  impressions,  Donald Trump,  Barack Obama,  Indecision 2012

Episode #08096

Stephen cancels his 6000K walkathon from Bangor, ME, to Oslo, Norway. (00:28)

Tags:  sign off,  marathons,  cracks up,  Maine,  Norway,  oceans,  apologies,  international affairs

Episode #08092

The Discovery shuttle makes a final flight to the Smithsonian, and NASA loses the Spacebook race. (02:56)

Tags:  astronauts,  space,  Internet,  NASA,  Smithsonian,  C.O.L.B.E.R.T.,  Carl Sagan,  sex,  cracks up,  Mars,  Planet Hollywood,  Neil Armstrong,  growing up,  Twitter

Episode #08090

Pheromone parties encourage premarital smelling, and Arizona lawmakers declare that pregnancy begins two weeks before conception. (04:22)

Tags:  Tip/Wag,  men/women,  Arizona,  dating,  sex,  pregnancy,  Republicans,  gross-out,  abortion,  Doris Kearns Goodwin,  apologies,  vaginas,  menstrual cycle,  laws,  Nana & Pee-Pop,  balls,  penises,  Mozart,  under the desk,  cracks up,  mental health,  birth control,  partying,  music

Episode #08082

Mitt Romney must pick a running mate who will help him appeal to women, Hispanics, African Americans, evangelical Christians and Republicans. (05:10)

Tags:  Steve King,  candidates,  Mitt Romney,  trials/hearings,  cracks up,  elections,  gay/homosexual,  health,  appearances,  insurance,  Republicans,  lawsuits,  discrimination,  business,  Indecision,  terminations,  laws,  farming,  right-wing,  growing up

Episode #08070

Strange things start happening to Mitt Romney, and Jeff Foxworthy joins his Southern primary campaign. (03:30)

Tags:  primaries,  the South,  Newt Gingrich,  Mitt Romney,  impressions,  under the desk,  Jeff Foxworthy,  cracks up,  costumes,  blue collar,  Republicans,  Alabama,  Mississippi,  Richard Nixon,  Jimmy,  food,  lookin' good,  balls,  Ron Paul,  Indecision 2012,  candidates,  campaigns,  Dukes of Hazzard

Episode #08070

Scientists find another use for lifesaving bacon, and ultrasound shuts down sperm production in rat testes. (05:05)

Tags:  Cheating Death,  Dr. Stephen T. Colbert DFA,  bacon,  men/women,  health,  cocaine,  menstrual cycle,  cracks up,  birth control,  drugs,  Prescott Group,  photos,  gross-out,  pregnancy,  balls,  animals,  abstinence,  music,  penises,  songs,  print media

Episode #08060

In 1906, an earthquake struck California's 8th district, leveling San Francisco and marking the last time anyone could afford to live there without six roommates. (02:28)

Tags:  Better Know a District,  San Francisco,  California,  Nancy Pelosi,  Native American,  religion,  history,  earthquakes,  Wheel of Fortune,  books,  appearances,  costumes,  under the desk,  Lent,  holidays,  housing,  hippies,  food,  cracks up,  WristStrong,  on location,  BKAD

Episode #08050

Chinese tycoon and friend of the show Long Liyuan dies after indulging in a poisoned meal of slow-boiled cat-meat stew. (03:45)

Tags:  Un-American News,  China,  Chinese New Year,  wealth,  food,  cats & cats,  racism,  gross-out,  murder,  friend of the show,  Stephen's friends,  ALF,  Stephen's products,  under the desk,  animals,  international affairs,  advertising,  cracks up,  Korean,  friends,  photos,  Asian,  iPad,  labor

Episode #08032

Virus-laden pops have the taste kids love with the proven effectiveness of something licked by a stranger, and one person's poop can restore another person's good bacteria. (05:55)

Tags:  Cheating Death,  Dr. Stephen T. Colbert DFA,  Vaxa,  Prescott Group,  kids,  health,  mental health,  parenting,  mongering,  mail/e-mail,  laws,  food,  cracks up,  gross-out,  doctors,  poop & pee,  Mitt Romney,  ethnic,  Christmas,  gifts & presents

Episode #08028

Fox New's Bret Baier asks Mitt Romney questions he doesn't want to answer, thereby making him look bad. (03:24)

Tags:  Mitt Romney,  Bret Baier,  Fox News,  media,  work/office,  Jimmy,  under the desk,  cracks up,  animation,  balls,  Harvey Birdman,  flip-flopper,  George W. Bush,  campaigns,  candidates,  Indecision,  Indecision 2012,  Republicans

Episode #08018

Hargrave markets yachts as a necessity for escape, and Silicon Valley billionaire Peter Thiel funds a network of artificial Libertarian islands. (06:42)

Tags:  Colbert Platinum,  wealth,  boats,  SUVs,  limos,  transportation,  mongering,  violence,  poop & pee,  guns,  safety,  Occupy Wall Street,  protests,  Libertarians,  food,  cannibalism,  dreams,  animals,  Star Wars,  Mexican,  photos,  God,  dental,  cracks up,  facial hair,  farming,  immigration

Episode #08018

Seth Meyers believes that "Saturday Night Live"'s Weekend Update provides an alternative for Americans unfulfilled by mainstream news options. (05:41)

Tags:  Seth Meyers,  interviews,  Northwestern University,  college,  East Coast,  Ivy League,  elitism,  Saturday Night Live,  Lorne Michaels,  work/office,  media,  impressions,  Robert DeNiro,  cracks up,  apologies,  accept your apology

Episode #08010

Herman Cain's ad sends the message that he doesn't just want to be the president of the United States, he wants to be the president of flavor country. (07:51)

Tags:  Herman Cain,  advertising,  Mitt Romney,  polls,  immigration,  border security,  media,  smoking,  under the desk,  parody,  death,  alcohol,  drugs,  guns,  addiction,  I Am America (And So Can You!),  Megyn Kelly,  media,  Jimmy,  music,  candidates,  campaigns,  Indecision,  Indecision 2012,  elections,  health,  mental health,  cracks up,  Colbert Bump,  challenges

Episode #07122

Rick Perry throws up all over himself at the third Republican debate, and Arizona steals South Carolina's presidential primary date. (06:43)

Tags:  Rick Perry,  debates,  speeches,  poetry,  George H.W. Bush,  Brit Hume,  puking,  poop & pee,  gross-out,  Rick Santorum,  George W. Bush,  Bushisms,  Jimmy,  monkeys!,  Mitt Romney,  candidates,  Republicans,  Indecision,  Indecision 2012,  campaigns,  mental health,  cracks up,  South Carolina,  primaries,  Arizona,  Florida,  senior citizens,  Jan Brewer,  money,  asses,  polls,  business,  flags,  voting,  Heroe$ Crawl

Episode #07112

Whenever terrorists come up with a new way to attack air travel, the TSA finds innovative ways to overreact, but all that security is about to disappear. (05:33)

Tags:  TSA,  flying,  security,  travel,  secret Muslim,  terrorism,  America,  technology,  Janet Napolitano,  Islamic,  nudity,  penises,  photos,  Jimmy,  cracks up,  food,  fashion,  9/11,  WMDs,  Saddam Hussein,  apologies,  Barack Obama,  public indecency,  Heroe$ Crawl

Episode #07111

The American Council on Exercise finds that toning shoes offer no benefits, and pharmaceutical companies create two-for-one combination pills to extend their patents. (06:21)

Tags:  Cheating Death,  Dr. Stephen T. Colbert DFA,  Vaxa,  Prescott Group,  exercise,  weight/obesity,  health,  breasts,  asses,  photos,  poop & pee,  food,  lookin' good,  fashion,  cracks up,  Heroe$ Crawl,  drugs

Episode #07110

If "Depard-two" tickled Anderson Cooper's funny bone, Stephen has just the thing to slit his jocular vein. (04:25)

Tags:  Anderson Cooper,  cracks up,  poop & pee,  CNN,  On Notice/Dead to Me,  fights,  Jimmy,  Gerard Depardieu,  Steve Doocy,  celebrities,  media,  lookin' good,  Harry Potter,  Heroe$ Crawl,  flying

Episode #07109

Colbert Super PAC beats back wannabe super PACs to become Rick Perry's official unofficial, non-connected, independent expenditure, all-you-can-eat money trough. (06:00)

Tags:  Rick Perry,  Texas,  polls,  Colbert Super PAC,  photos,  Jimmy,  Indecision,  Indecision 2012,  candidates,  elections,  business,  guns,  EPA,  unemployment,  Address the Mess,  environment,  under the desk,  health,  food,  Houston,  balls,  competitions,  South Carolina,  performances,  songs,  money,  the heroes,  cracks up,  movies,  church and state

Episode #07109

Evangelical scientists break up the Bible's most famous couple, and Rick Santorum puts the issue of gay marriage into terms everyday people can understand. (05:09)

Tags:  Tip/Wag,  Adam and Eve,  Bible,  Jesus,  Rick Santorum,  Republicans,  accountability,  Christian,  science,  genetics,  sex,  religion,  marriage,  same-sex marriage,  gay/homosexual,  men/women,  Ten Commandments,  sexual advances,  God,  snakes,  bestiality,  James Carville,  Happy Days,  cracks up,  dogs,  puking,  Google,  the heroes