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The Colbert Report Search Results
A Molotov cocktail of doom known as Phobos-Grunt hurtles toward the Earth's surface, threatening New York, London and Tokyo. (03:57)
An early version of the Defense Appropriations bill repeals the rule banning bestiality in the military, and the Toronto Zoo's gay penguins turn straight. (05:01)
The American Heritage Dictionary's lexicowards redefine an offensive term, and Newt Gingrich thinks of new ways to make Americans afraid. (06:05)
The soft-on-terror-crats mischaracterize Michigan's ice shaving machines as a frivolous waste of tax money, but there's no reason that fighting terror shouldn't be fun. (04:42)
Virus-laden pops have the taste kids love with the proven effectiveness of something licked by a stranger, and one person's poop can restore another person's good bacteria. (05:55)
Stephen calls out the lamestream media for "Boob Week" and other cheap ratings gropes. (03:56)
According to KPHO, Phoenix's news leader, boys and girls across America are soaking tampons in vodka and literally getting drunk off their asses. (03:48)
Hargrave markets yachts as a necessity for escape, and Silicon Valley billionaire Peter Thiel funds a network of artificial Libertarian islands. (06:42)
Before researching the Lord's Resistance Army, Rush Limbaugh accuses Barack Obama of killing Christians in Uganda. (04:15)
Some states have found a great way to discourage illegal immigrants from coming to America and squatting out a freedom fetus. (05:06)
According to NASA's calculations, Americans have either until Saturday morning to evacuate the Earth or they were vaporized two hours ago. (04:22)
If Americans let the government mandate the HPV vaccine, they might as well let the U.N.'s jackbooted thugs inject their daughters with pharmaceutical-grade slut juice. (04:20)
Robin Wright believes that, by rejecting extremism, Muslims have created the most important political turning point of the early 21st century. (07:09)
Political junkies get a fix through compulsive donations to presidential campaigns. (02:41)
Part-time weather balloon Rush Limbaugh exposes the government-manufactured heat index conspiracy, while SpongeBob brainwashes kids with global warming propaganda. (04:59)
Free birth control will wipe out the American race and instantly turn daughters into wanton harlots with insatiable sexual appetites. (04:42)
NPR host Brooke Gladstone explains why her graphic novel is similar to radio and fights the popular notion that the media control minds. (05:40)
Just because Norway's confessed murderer is a blond, blue-eyed, Norwegian-born, anti-Muslim crusader doesn't mean he's not a swarthy, ululating madman. (05:09)
Timothy Garton Ash talks about his book "Facts Are Subversive" and discusses the decline of the Western world in an ever-changing geopolitical landscape. (05:39)
New York State legalizes gay marriage despite Bill O'Reilly warnings about interspecies romance. (03:53)
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